Step Ten

"Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." 

Every day my Higher Power's voice, that still small voice within, leads me in a process of self-reflection and I am stretched to new places, courageous places, honest places and humble places. I am learning how to honor myself and how to honor others. I am establishing boundaries and when something isn't working I am moving that boundary. I am trying new things, exploring different ways of doing things and learning who I really am.

And I am making mistakes, sometimes big mistakes, as I navigate through this new life of mine.

Profound and subtle changes have occured since I started the 12 steps. Some changes are obvious but most are internal and personal. If I am willing to be honest with myself I will see lots of opportunities for continual growth and spiritual development. Sometimes I simply need to recognize a shortcoming and have the willingness to bring it to God, other times I need to make amends to someone I have hurt. I used to think recognizing a shortcoming was enough but I've found great value in humbling myself enough to admit when I was wrong -even if the other person/people involved didn't express any concern or have knowledge of my wrongdoing. For example, one time I lied and said I was late for work because my car wouldn't start when the truth of the matter was that I had overslept. That "Little Voice" encouraged me to admit my wrong and tell the truth on myself -so I did. That act of confession has provided me with a degree of insurance against making the same mistake again. Humbling ourselves enough to admit our wrongs changes us in ways that simply recognizing them never could.

Brutal honesty is not necessary; we can be gentle with ourselves and stay just as honest! And let's not always focus on the negative. What are we doing well? Where are we shining? How much closer are we to being our true, loving selves? Focusing on all our wrongs will never make us right. We need to build ourselves up not pick ourselves apart. We are beautiful, living, works of art in progress.